1. Mike Rogers, chairman of the U.S. House of Representative’s Intelligence Committee, said on Friday he will leave Congress at year’s end to host a radio talk show. Keep in mind the man making the decision to switch jobs to start working in the dying medium that is terrestrial radio was the head of the Intelligence Committee.
2. According to 2013 statistics, Atlanta’s Hartsfield-Jackson Airport is the busiest in the world. While the least busy is whatever airport Malaysian flight 370 was supposed to land at.
3. According to author Michael Lewis’s new book, the u.S. stock market is rigged in favor of high-speed electronic trading firms. Which explains why the new wealthiest man according to Forbes is the E-Trade baby.
4. A federal judge on Monday rejected a request by Planned Parenthood to block a new Arizona regulation that would limit the use of abortion-inducing drugs. But cheer up, it’s still legal in Arizona to “accidentally” fall down a flight of stairs.
5. Now that same sex marriage is legal in England, Elton John announced he will wed his longtime partner David Furnish. The groom is expected to wear Versace while the bride will wear a full length Donald Duck costume.
6. An 8-year-old South Carolina girl has the state to consider naming the woolly mammoth the official state fossil. If successful, this will replace the old state fossil, Strom Thurmond.
7. An 8-year-old South Carolina girl’s dream of having the woolly mammoth become the official state fossil has been put on hold while lawmakers debate an amendment that gives God credit for creating the prehistoric animal. But, in the state’s defense, that is a pretty stupid dream.
8. Yesterday, New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio was boo’d while throwing out the first pitch at the Mets’ home opener. Afterwards, the crowd apologized saying, “We thought you were a Met.”
9. Yesterday, NBC announced that Pharrell Williams will be joining the cast of “the Voice.” Although I’m willing to bet your mom will call him by the same name she calls Usher, Cee-Lo.
10. Yesterday, Secret Service arrested a man who was attempting to scale the wall surrounding the White House. “I guess it’s back to the drawing board again,” said Mitt Romney.
